I feel like I’m on repeat every day with the things I have to say to my kids.
They have the attention span of puppies (or they just love messing with me).
From morning till night. It’s “don’t do this…stop doing that…”
Here is my daily run down. I’m sure it’s a similar list for most parents.
These are my top 10.
1. Don’t touch your sister!
Seriously! Stop touching your sister! You’re bugging her, therefore, her whining is bugging me. I’m not particularly concerned with her being upset, I just don’t want to hear about it.
2. Stop spreading your toys out all over the house!
Look, you’ve got it made. Two rooms in the house dedicated to you. All for you. I don’t bring my pots and pans into your playroom and leave them everywhere for you to trip over. So please, don’t leave an open umbrella in my kitchen for me to fall on. Don’t bury 20 stuffed animals under my covers for me to to share my bed with. You literally have the biggest room in this house for your toys plus your bedroom. Enjoy this while you can, because when you have kids, you won’t ever have this luxury again.
3. Get out of my bathroom!
Age old parent complaint. Let me got to the bathroom by myself. I don’t understand how you can be on the other side of the house, unaware of my existence, until the minute I step into my bathroom. Then you are at my door as if you have teleported yourself there. Let this be the few peaceful minutes of my day.
4. Don’t talk to me when I’m on the phone!
How come the second I get on the phone you guys spill a gallon of milk or decide this is the time to have a death match with each other? I’m pretty sure every person I’ve been on the phone with in the last 5 years thinks I’m mentally unstable.
5. Stop announcing in public that you have to poop!
Especially at church. Please, the second there is silence don’t announce to the congregation that it’s time for you to go #2. No one, I repeat, no one wants to know that.
6. We don’t pick our nose and eat our boogers!
Should be self explanatory, but apparently it isn’t to a 5 and 3 year old. Children, society frowns upon this activity and it’s just gross.
7. Please stop telling me that my boobs are weird or my tummy is fat.
It’s just rude.
8. Don’t wake the baby!!!!
For the love of my sanity…stop stomping around outside the babies bedroom while he sleeps! Stop fighting, screaming, slamming doors, while he sleeps. If you don’t want to see my head spin, then don’t do these things!
9. Stop talking and eat your food.
It really shouldn’t take you an hour to eat dinner. Seriously, you’re killing me.
10. I love you!
No matter how irritated I get or how annoyed at you I am. I still love you and always will.
That last one is something I say everyday, a few times a day. No matter how crazy these kids drive me, and they do drive me nuts, I want them to know how much I truly love them.
If someone is going to drive me into a mental facility, I’m glad it’s these guys.